Tuesday, October 31, 2006
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(141) if logic dictates...
'Work fascinates me'
I can look at it for hours.
'Hard work never killed anybody'
But why take the risk.
Never put off the work till tomorrow
what you can put off today.
A bus station is where a bus stops.
A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station.
What more can I say......
the pig oinked at
11:38 AM
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Friday, October 27, 2006
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(140) logically speaking...
Minor Premise:
One man can complete a task in sixty seconds.
Major Premise:
Sixty men can complete a task sixty times as quickly as one man.
Conclusion:
Sixty men can complete a task in one second.
the pig oinked at
4:08 AM
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Tuesday, October 24, 2006
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(139) words as weapons, sharper than knives...
Many local netizens would have, by now, heard of the 'wee-wee' saga. The perils of blogging are very real and I wouldn't want to be in that RJC girl's shoes right now. So always remember the one and only rule in blogging...... BE NICE!
Actually, it is a very simple rule, a 'common sense' rule. Just watch what you blog! Don't insult anyone, don't be abusive, don't be obscene, don't attack people personally and avoid inflammatory topics. It's ok to disagree, provided your tone is respectful. If in doubt, it's best you 'sleep on it' before publishing. This is not a matter of censorship. It's a matter of giving mature thought to each post.
You are publishing to a world audience. You publish not just today, but for the rest of your life because even if you shut down your blog, the posts can come back to haunt you. Things that you blog today can be incredibly damaging to your professional career and/or personal life years down the road. The world will judge you and not always fairly. Be prepared for the consequences and to accept the responsibility for each post you choose to publish. Shivers!!
the pig oinked at
6:18 AM
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Tuesday, October 17, 2006
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(138) believe it or not...
Starfish haven't got brains.
Butterflies taste with their feet.
A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.
The electric chair was invented by a dentist.
You can't kill yourself by holding your breath.
It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.
No word in the English language rhymes with month.
China has more English speakers than the United States.
The ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.
Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
'I am.' is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.
If you keep a goldfish in a dark room, it will eventually turn white.
A cockroach will live 9 days without its head, before it starves to death.
The name of all the continents end with the same letter that they start with.
Donald Duck comics were banned in Finland because he doesn't wear pants.
If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
The shortest war in history was between Zanzibar and England in 1896. Zanzibar surrendered after 38 minutes.
You share your birthday with at least 9 million other people in the world!
Yes, it is my birthday today! Hmmm... when one hits the 40s, his/her birthday is a relatively quiet affair. But my mum never forgets anyone's birthday, be it her children, their spouses or grandchildren! She baked me a cake and gave me an angpow on Sunday.
I was still up when Darrick sent an sms at 12.32am while my sister in London sent her wishes at 12.58am. Judith's sms came in at a more 'normal' time at 9.55am. Then Issac rang to wish me a good day. When I got the 'snail' mail, there were 2 birthday cards - one from Judith, the other from Issac. Then Judith tagged my board cos she believes all good thing should come in threes!
Laogong didn't go to work today so that we could go on a lunch date. Hah, guess where?! Later in the night, Laogong got the kids to sing the birthday song while I cut the cake that my mum baked. Hahaha... 1 candle only!
The grand finale was a silver chain and cross pendant from Ben! Wahhhh... he took half-day off from camp to go buy me a present! Aiyah, his army allowance is so measley and yet, he bought me something from the jewellers! Then, I can't wait for all of them to join the workforce and earn big fat salaries....
HAPPY 47 YEARS YOUNG TO ME, MYSELF & I!
the pig oinked at
2:48 PM
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Monday, October 09, 2006
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(137) reincarnation...
Mooncakes! They are so evilly laden with calories! My favourite, the lotus seed paste with one salted egg yolk, contains 790 calories. Drats, and it's getting harder and harder to lose all that excess weight. I'm fighting a losing battle...
the pig oinked at
11:28 AM
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Wednesday, October 04, 2006
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(136) it's a conspiracy, i tell you...
For eons, I've been visiting my parents practically every Sunday. My siblings and their children also visit on Sundays and the cousins will have a fun time together. But it is getting harder and harder to meet up so often as the kids get older. They have project work, camps and most importantly, they need to prepare for their Os and As (PSLE was chicken feed!)
The weekly visits to the grandparents have now been cut down to alternate Sundays and at times, only once a month. But I try to make it up by dropping by on weekdays to take my parents out or run errands for them. So it was really fun to see and chat with my nephews again last Sunday......
BMM: Hey, Darrick! What's this I read in the New Paper about a fight club in your college?
Darrick: There is no fight club. It was an isolated incident of mischief.
BMM: Come on lah, the newspaper says got.
Darrick: There is no fight club. It was an isolated incident of mischief.
BMM: Aiyah, some students even wrote about the fight club in their blogs!
Darrick: There is no fight club. It was an isolated incident of mischief.
BMM: Did you go watch the fight?
Darrick: There is no fight club. It was an isolated incident of mischief.
BMM: How come some students got caught? They couldn't outrun the police?
Darrick: There is no fight club. It was an isolated incident of mischief.
BMM: Aye, tell us leh!
Darrick: There is no fight club. It was an isolated incident of mischief.
BMM: Whoa... your principal's gag order is really effective.
Darrick: There is no fight club. It was an isolated incident of mischief.
This guy will make a great soldier! The enemy will get nothing out of him 
the pig oinked at
11:38 PM
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*
(135) is there a doctor in the house?
Two sick kids in the house... diarrhea, vomiting, nausea and fever. Was it something they ate or is it stomach flu? Emily first got it in school yesterday morning. Jon only had it very late last night or rather, at 4am this morning. And this is the second time in 2 weeks that Jon had these symptoms.
Laogong's ok. Ben's ok. The maid's ok and I'm ok. So what the heck is it? Well, they had just woken up and are taking their fish porridge now. Poor things, they look so sick and weak (must be exhausted from the constant toilet calls).
Aiyah... Jon has finished his lunch but has fallen asleep again. Emily? She's still struggling with her tiny bit of porridge. Looking at them now, I wonder how I'm going to get them to the doctor's?
UPDATE:
Jon refused to go to the doctor's. He insisted he was much better already. What a stubborn fella he is! Anyway, the doctor prescribed a course of antibiotics for Emily. He added that Jon should have come for a check as he had a similar episode on 19 September (that's exactly 2 weeks ago)! The good doctor is either a very caring one or $$$$$$-faced...
the pig oinked at
4:38 AM
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Monday, October 02, 2006
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(134) elementary, my dear watson!
This is the last of my lame (but inspirational?) posts for students preparing for the English Language paper. Maybe my next one will be for the Chinese Language paper!?
For Paper 2, every student knows that he/she has to:
* identify the main ideas and details in texts
* use contextual clues to understand the information present in a text
* synthesise, summarise and organise information
* give reasons to support an opinion or a response
How a student will fare depends on his/her level of the above skills. These skills that the student should master are not unlike those which every self-respecting detective should be equipped with. So if you read enough mystery novels, you should do very well for Paper 2. Hahaha... BMM's naive logic??
Well, I love mysteries and my favourite author (authoress actually) is Agatha Christie. Sadly, she was not the one who created perhaps the most famous fictional detective and indeed one of the best known and universally recognisable literary characters...
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went camping. In the middle of the night, they both woke up and were staring up at the night sky.
Holmes: Watson, look up into the sky and tell me what you see.
Watson: I see thousands and thousands of stars.
Holmes: And what does that tell you?
Watson: Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Theologically, it tells me that God is great and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it tells me that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?
Holmes: Somebody stole our tent.
the pig oinked at
2:18 AM
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